Day 1: Counting the Days

“How old will I be when Logan is 10?,” my son, Lucas, asks on the car ride to school.

“8 years old,” I reply.

“And how old will Logan be when I’m 22?”

“24,” Logan declares with certainty.

This game of verbal addition and subtraction is a regular pastime for Lucas. He thinks a lot about how old he is in relation to everyone in the family.

These days, I’m thinking a lot about age, too. In 40 days I’ll turn 40 years old. I’m excited and reflective. And I’m wondering what the next 40 years have in store. Actually, what does the next year hold? I flow between feeling like I have a new time unfolding before me and feeling like I only have so much time left. I feel so busy. How to keep up with everything, to do everything I want to do?

When I was pregnant with my first child, Logan, one of the most memorable gifts I received was, oddly enough, an open pack of newborn pampers. Unused, of course. The pampers were repackaged in a pretty basket and in each pamper was a note from each person at the shower. The notes shared advice, good wishes, and reflections. I still remember the note from my friend, Esther, who wrote, “This time is definitely time-less. But remember that it is also timeless.”

She was right. I often feel like I don’t have enough time — to run errands, clean the house, exercise, go to a movie, sit down, sleep, read. But I see my children growing up so quickly and I know that my time is also quite timeless. My time is full. And in such meaningful ways. Would I want it any other way?

For me, writing is a vital mode of self-expression, self-reflection, and creativity. I really enjoy it — even when I find myself at a loss for words. So, for the next 40 days, I’m going to use this blog as a standing appointment to write daily. It’s my way of giving time to something that has been so important to me for so long, that I value yet don’t always manage to practice. And knowing that, every once in a while, someone might stop by and see what I’m up to, I’m even more likely to make sure I keep the appointment.

And if I miss a day? I’ll just return the next day.

“How old will you be, mommy, when I’m infinity?,” Lucas wonders.


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8 Responses to Day 1: Counting the Days

  1. David K says:

    A few years back my brother decided that he had to throw out a lot of junk and spare equipment that he had collected. So he decided to make a blog. He was going to throw out 100 things in 100 days or something like that, and write a blog post about each and every piece of junk that he was going to throw away, give away or sell. It was kind of cool. I probably read about three of the entries. I hope to read many more of yours.

    • Dave, Thanks for leaving the first comment! Your brother’s blog idea sounds fascinating. It might help me get passed the writer’s block I will undoubtedly face at some point during the next 40 days. Thanks!

  2. sedefscorner says:

    Bravo… you know I am all for writing your heart out… I started to write for the first time in my life, six months before I turned 40 and now thanks to your advice I consider myself a real blogger. Now, must be the right time for you too… good luck… and welcome to a wonderful new world and community where you can never predict where you may end up or whom you may meet?
    I would like to leave with a favorite quote of mine from Anne Lamott that has become my philosophy when it comes to blogging…
    “Light houses don’t go chasing around the island looking for people to save, they just shine.”
    You keep on shining and I will definitely be reading…

  3. Sinan says:

    This is a wonderful project (with a great built-in self-motivational hook)! I’m looking forward to keeping up with your blog and maybe it will help inspire me to write a bit more – I’ve been an irregular journal writer with bold dreams of daily writing. And I love looking back on old writing and trying to recapture the feeling of who I was at the time. I anticipate this will be something you, Nigel and the kids can look back on in the future with fond memories for this moment in your lives.

    • Thanks, Sinon. Yeah, it’s so hard to keep an appointment with myself to write. This blog is where my personal desire to write more meets public pressure. Hopefully, these days will be thought-ful ones.

  4. Sharad Vivek says:

    i’m comin’ in late, but happy to jump aboard…really cool idea…thought there might be some Lent undertones, which is a topic i am sure you will be hitting as well… why should religion be let off the hook? Not like Christianity cornered the market on all things 40, right?…been a while since we’ve spoken, although i caught up with Nigel after Wyatt was born, so have an idea of how things are, but i look forward to using your creativity and this spot in the cyber-world to reconnect….

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